Poor Kitten
Born to the world which itself didn’t ask,
Or maybe its karma did.

Little big eyes darting left and right,
Searching for food, avoiding danger,
or perhaps wondering the purpose of its existence.
Not. Just searching for food, looking out for danger.
No time to be an existentialist!

Poor Akila,
In the streets of Hyderabad,
Didn’t ask to be born, probably just a by-product,
of some adult indulgences.

Little big eyes darting left and right,
Searching for food, avoiding danger,
and came she knocked on the Tata Aria window;
shaking her little head left and right, she pleaded;
“Saheb, bread please”

As per my earlier post, I said that I will post about Godard’s PIERROT LE FOU and I will. However, as anyone who has some idea of Gabriel Garcia Marquez’s (or better known as Gabo) work, will notice from the title of this post that I am about to write something about his CHRONICLE OF A DEATH FORETOLD.

It is a short novel about the death of a guy who is foretold, i.e. the whole town knows that he is going to be killed, when and where he is going to be killed and why he is to be killed. However, somehow, no one does anything about it and he indeed was killed in a most gruesome way, without a clue himself why he has to suffer such a fate. In fact, it is almost bewildering why it is that the whole town knows that he is going to die but this news seem to escape him.

The reason for his murder is simple; the twin brother of a girl wants to redeem the family and their sister’s honour because the sister was returned home by her new husband because he found out the night itself that she is not a virgin. The girl was beaten and asked to confess who is the guy who stained her and she named the unfortunate guy. However, no one really believes that he is the guy, which is probably one reason why the guy has a puzzled look when his killers went after him. Who is the real guy who took her virginity? Well, it was left silent in the novel.

In the midst of this storytelling, there are many things that Gabo did that made the story click and enjoyable to read, the details and the occasional mystery and magic that he pumped in. All in all, this is a superb novel and anyone who wishes to have something enjoyable to read over a weekend can pick this book up.

Now about PIERROT LE FOU. Godard. Jean-Luc Godard. What a director he is. This movie was released in 1965, hot in the midst of the French New Wave. This movie reminds me of many movies, although it is of itself very unique. It reminds me, most of all, of BREATHLESS and of BONNIE AND CLYDE. It won’t be a wonder if it actually had some influence on BONNIE AND CLYDE which was released two years after this movie. In those years, movies influence each other as it is apparent that Hollywood movie influenced European movies a whole lot, and in fact inspired the European filmmakers a big deal. It is no surprise to see many Hollywood references in European movies and if one has seen THE DREAMERS, one will also have an appreciation on the fireworks that Hollywood had on European, particularly French cinema.

If anything, PIERROT LE FOU is made such a good movie by its actors, both Jean-Paul Belmondo whose excellent performance we have also seen in BREATHLESS and Anna Karina whom we have seen in many movies, especially BAND OF OUTSIDERS and MY LIFE TO LIVE, one of my favourite Godard movies.

PIERROT LE FOU is about a guy and his so-called girlfriend, who is quite sick of a boring life and seeks adventure. They are free spirits and could not stand Jules Vernes for long and had to go for a gangster movie once in a while. The ending is tragic but is befitting. The film techniques is, ermmm, technical, employing strong primary colours, uses of cuts, repetitive dialogue, looking at the camera and talking to the audience (not as subtle as the final scene in Truffaut’s 400 BLOWS but is also very effective), etc. On the latter, i.e. looking at the audience, it is somehow effective, for example, in a scene, Belmondo is looking at the camera and talking and Karina asked him what he is doing and the effect is that they are conscious of an audience watching them and the audience is made conscious that the actors on the screen knows that someone is watching them and listening to what they are saying. This is especially so when they are on the run from the law.

PIERROT LE FOU is really a celebration of cinema. One feels happy after watching the movie, and as Gabo felt after reading Kafka’s THE METAMORPHOSIS where he suddenly realized that novels can be written in that way, after watching PIERROT LE FOU, one also realizes that “oh, movies can also be made like this”.

A gem and masterpiece indeed.

Okay, the next post will be a post about Godard’s PIERROT LE FOU but for this post, since two of our players Suzzane and Jimmy is now in Japan for the International Pair Go Tournament, I would like to comment on a book that I recently read, THE GO CONSULTANTS.

It is a book about a game whereby Go Seigen and Kitani are one team and Segoe Kensaku and Suzuki Tamejiro another. It was thought to be a great pairing up as both Go Seigen and Kitani are popular for their New Fuseki theory while the two older masters are in the conventional camp, although Suzuki is actually Kitani’s teacher and Segoe was said to be Go Seigen’s teacher (but it was not officially mentioned).

The idea is that both players on each side of the game can adjourn anytime during the game and go to another room to consult each other and in that room, there is a reporter waiting to record their conversations and analysis. This way, we know exactly what they are thinking.

I would dare say that everything that one needs to know how to play Go well is in this book. There is an analysis on every aspect of the game, from Opening moves to whole board joseki consideration, to Go strategic concepts such as thickness, influence, strength and weakness of groups, efficiency, aji, miai, tesuji, yose, positional judgment etc. etc.

The book is about 150 pages and that is only for ONE game alone. Just imagine that kind of analysis that is in the book. This is a wonderful book indeed.

Perhaps it is true that I am blogging too much about Go, which of course is not a bad thing, but the fact is that for a Jack of All Trades like myself, there are other things that is happening that I would also like to talk about or update. My geeky friend (as I have called her since the first time I wrote on this blog) who is now in Hong Kong already complained that this blog of mine is becoming a blog exclusively about Go! Where did all the movies go? That is true.

Anyways, for a fact, I have not spent time exclusively on Go, which explains why I am still so bad at that game. Perhaps a short update on recent activities is due?

Non-Go related book that I am currently reading:

Gabriel Garcia Marquez: A Life by Gerald Martin.

I have been quite a fan of Gabo (as he is affectionately called) and I wonder who wouldn’t if they have spent some time reading such works as ONE HUNDRED YEARS OF SOLITUDE and LOVE IN THE TIME OF CHOLERA.

On his last visit to Malaysia, my dear friend Dr. Sudah whom I refer to as the Sexy Doctor or the Mahler lookalike (here is his blog:The Physician Anthropologist), was reading the aforesaid book and I was intrigued. Luckily I found the book in MPH which was a surprise after looking high and low in Kinokuniya and Borders to no avail.

Gabo’s story is very inspiring, a rags to riches story and I am currently at almost half of the book and is enjoying it very much. The opening chapter on the family genealogy can be quite confusing but should not be something that anyone who has read ONE HUNDRED YEARS OF SOLITUDE cannot handle. After the opening chapter, the rest is a breeze and an enjoyable read. At a certain point, I thought I really wanted to be an author like Gabo too.

Movies Watched:

Hayao Miyazaki’s PONYO ON THE CLIFF. Oh my goodness. I have been wanting to watch this for the longest time but alas! it was not shown in Malaysian cinemas. I managed to get a 2-DVD set while in Korea and have watched it. What an amazing piece of art this is. Ponyo is just so cute and adorable, the soundtrack is superb as usual and it is very uplifting. Both my wife and myself felt so much happier after watching this movie.

INGLORIOUS BASTERDS. I have also been waiting for this for the longest time and it did not disappoint. Typical Quentin Tarantino extravaganza of unforgettable scenes and dialog. I was quite worried about Brad Pitt before the movie but after watching it, I felt he is perfect for the role.

POKER KING. Despite being a fan of Texas Hold’em, I do not find this movie to be really good and I felt that the twist at the end of the movie rather lame. However, this is an enjoyable movie and quite entertaining. I like Wong You-nam very much in the movie. I cannot but compare it to ROUNDERS and I find ROUNDERS a better movie, although perhaps on the enjoyment level, POKER KING is at least at par. After the movie, I chatted with my geeky friend over the phone and she highlighted to me the subtleties in the movie, on the state of affairs in Macau and how the industry is wrecking havoc on the economy and such. Anyways, lovers of Hong Kong movie should not miss this movie though.

Well, that’s a few things that I am doing or have just recently done this week that is not Go related.

I am planning to start reading a novel but I can’t decide which one to read. Hmmmm……

So I am now back from Jeonju, Korea. It is a very nice town, serene and beautiful. It is a very good blend of the traditional and the modern. I could have lived there. It is also the hometown of Lee Changho, the top Go player who has won more than 20 world titles. Here is my picture with him. I was so fortunate to be able to have a photo with him. I met him in Singapore during the Ing cup but didn’t manage to take any photos, so here it is, one of my missions in Go has been accomplished :)

Photo credit: Billy

Jeanju is a nice blend of the traditional and the modern. On one side of the town we can see very traditional houses but just walk for a while and cross the street, it is a completely fashionable area with lots of teenagers and modern things to feast the senses.

Photo credit: Jayden

One of the dishes that Jeonju is famous for, the Bibimbap:

Photo credit: Xinwen

The Jeonju trip is for the Korea Prime Minister Cup (KPMC) Baduk (Go) Tournament. Here are some pictures:

Photo credit: Xinwen

Photo credit: Jayden

Some friends:

Handy – Indonesia Official

Sharen – Brunei Official

Jayden the superb photographer

Extremely blur guy Xinwen

Our player, the superb Zaid Waqi.

On the last day, we had a simultaneous game with professionals as well as touring. Here is the photo with the cute professional that I played with:

Some photos of the area (all thanks to our superb photographer Jayden.)

The champion from South Korea on the left versus Japan.

In my earlier post, I have made a vow to treat each game seriously and play seriously. I think I have more or less done that, I have tried to play more seriously although there are games that I have tried some new fuseki ideas (those I played with will know what I am talking about).

However, playing seriously is different from playing the most severe move every single time. You still can have a serious game but yet the moves may not be the most severe that one can imagine or play. This is because when you have a game that is won, you can safely play the moves that do not take the highest risks but play perhaps a second best move that can safely lead to a win. I am sure Hane Naoki sensei will endorse this idea as he has himself said this in his book “The Way of Creating a Thick and Strong Game”.

For example in my game with Anthony (one of the up and coming player, who is very determined to improve) yesterday, the first game I played him I gave him 4 handicap stones and won. Then we played a second game and Chyn playfully asked us to play a 6 handicap game which I thought, well why not? I won that game by 55points and Anthony said how come he lose so much more in a 6 handicap game compared to a 4 handicap game? I told him that it’s because in a 6 handicap game, my moves will be much more severe compared to a 4 handicap game. In that way, it is like what Hane Noaki sensei said, there is no need to take the highest risk and play the most severe move. Sometimes a low-risk second best move will win the game too.

Okay, today’s topic is about the 2nd Gobango Game that I have played. Since per my post below, I will write briefly on the bango games, here is something that I must pay more attention in my next game. I missed a handful of endgame moves and I realise I tend to really make mistakes in my endgame.

The game is against Philip (2d). I took black with no komi and I won that game by 22 points on the board. However, although it doesn’t affect the result of the game, I could have done something in the diagram below (approximate position only since we didn’t record the game). Black to move. What is the status? Can Black do anything? (this position is probably a 6-8kyu question. haha).

There is so much to study on Go. It is only slightly lesser compared to the time when I self-studied my way to the ACCA qualification. Studying Go now gives me the same self-study feeling. A rundown of the study materials as are currently on my desk which forms part of my self-devised study plan:

1. Fuseki

a. Dictionary of Basic Fuseki by Rin Kaiho. This is to read through and understand the fundamentals of fuseki. Although a bit dated, it is really an excellent survey of fuseki thoughts and ideas.

b. A Dictionary of Modern Fuseki – Korean Style. This is to complement the above, to bring it more up to date, although fuseki ideas keep on improving by the day. One has to put a line for study, furthermore, just by understanding this materials will be good enough to up my games by at least a couple of stones.

2. Joseki

a. Dictionary of Basic Joseki by Ishida Yoshio. This is an excellent survey of joseki. The explanation of moves and why they are good and why some others are bad is really illuminating. Joseki is like contact fighting. By understanding joseki, one will have a better understanding on fighting.

b. After Joseki by Kim Sung Rae. Joseki is just that many moves but what happens after that? This book explores some of the common joseki, in fact so common I just played some of it in my last game. But the book succeeds in showing me all the danger points after the joseki and how to defend or exploit those points.

3. Problems (Tesuji/Tsumego/Reading)

a. Segoe Kensaku and Go Seigen – Tesuji Dictionary
b. Segoe Kensaku – The Book To Increase Your Fighting Strength At Go
c. Gokyo Shumyo
d. Shuko – The Only Move Vol. 1 & 2

[already recently completed the Lee Chanho Tsumego and Tesuji set of 6 volumes in each set]

4. Pro Games

a. The Complete Games of Go Seigen – I am now only focusing on volume 4 and 5, covering his games in the early 1933 and all his Jubango games.
b. Gu Li Games compilation. Gu Li inspire me a lot. I like his style.

[already read and studied Kamakura twice and all of the Shusaku vs Ota Yuza's Sanjubango, also twice. Went through about 30 Lee Changho games seriously once. this is besides the normal reading of current pro games that is freely available from the internet.]

Quite a lot of things to study and now with the Gobango series, there is now good avenue to put into practice the lessons learned and Confucius would have been proud.

“sharpening the eye that observes and the eyes that see”

Day by day, I appreciate Musashi’s words more and more. What brilliant insights.

What is obvious may not be the truth, the truth may not be obvious. If one relies only on external signs and jumps to conclusion, how foolish indeed. To be able to “see” beyond the obvious, to be able to deduce the truth from both obvious and not obvious signs, it is a deep skill indeed, a skill that is worth cultivating. Only then will one steer clear of danger.

As Sun Tzu also said, “Warfare is the Tao of Deception. Although you are capable, display incapability” etc. Therefore, since time immemorial, to have mastered the skill in seeing through deception, to be able to see things as they really are, and not only what they appear to be, will therefore lead a person out of danger and steer safely through a jungle of deception and false appearances.

This is applicable to many aspects of our life, whether playing a game of Go, bringing up our children, negotiating a business deal or going to war.

For the fun of it, we have started a Gobango series in the club. The gobango is inspired by the old Japanese masters where they have a series of 10 games but because we don’t have that much time, we reduced it to 5 games and thus Go bango. Each player in the club is free to choose his or her opponents. My opponents confirmed so far are Alex, Xinwen and Philip. I have two more slots of which to fill.

Yesterday I had my first game with Alex and it was a disaster especially towards the late midgame/early endgame where I lost a lot of points and needlessly throw away stones because I have failed in my second precept in Go, i.e., to always think and verify before playing. I failed to do that and as a result my opponent captured the stones that I have carelessly played and increased his territory. If not the result won’t be as disastrous as this.

At the beginning, it was still ok but a joseki mistake and some psychological problem resulted in my stones getting sealed in. The joseki mistake was the star point-kakari-pincer-jump joseki which I am not very good at but somehow chose. I have used the low Chinese Fuseki which I am currently studying and below is the board position up to move 8:

I have had a game with Alex previously and the board position up to here is exactly the same. And Alex made the same jump. As I was studying this fuseki, none of the games in the database suggested this jump. Here is the board pattern search of over 100,000 professional and high dan amateur games. The most common reply for White is at “a”, i.e. san-san. There must be a reason why no one in that 100,000 plus games played the jump as Alex did with move number 8. I wanted to experiment to find the answer but the results for me was disastrous. Perhaps I am not strong enough. Maybe someone strong reading this can help.

My theory is that it is bad for White to let Black get territory on both sides of the board, i.e. the right side and the top side. But I am not sure.

Below is the position up to move 81. I notice my weakness of loving territory too much and getting sealed in everywhere, resulting in my opponent getting a huge center framework. I am working towards improving this psychological weakness and be more daring to venture into the center and be non-attached to corner and side territory.

As per above, I have failed strategically to limit White’s center potential and did not exploit the weakness in the formation and this breaks my first precept, i.e. always have a plan. I have failed to evaluate strategy and failed to formulate a plan to counter that central potential.

So I deserve to lose this game but my next game, I will improve and do my best again. Go is such an enjoyable game. Even more so when playing with great friends :)

Innuendo-Belaian Jiwa

Old song but quite nice.

Wrongly viewed among people of the world, not understanding anything is itself considered emptiness. This is not real emptiness; it is all delusion.

Without any confusion in mind, without slacking off at any time, polishing the mind and attention, sharpening the eye that observes and the eyes that see, one should know real emptiness as the state where there is no obscurity and the clouds of confusion have cleared away.

Wisdom exists, logic exists, the Way exists, mind is empty.

- From the Book of Five Rings.

Ok, well, I could have used a less offensive word but I can’t think of one that has the punch. Anyways, sorry if you find it offensive, although it is funny if anyone would have found something that we do perhaps everyday offensive. Something like digging nose. Okay okay. Let’s move on.

Nowadays I am getting more and more aware of the environment, not that I am not previously especially after Al Gore’s excellent awareness generating campaign. This is because I am now (well, actually since April) the champion (the term is EMR) for our company’s ISO140001 :2004 Environmental Management System program. We should get certified by November 2009, which is soon and thereafter we are targeting a Green Certification either from the New Zealand Ecolabel or the LEED from the US.

Enormous amount of work! We have to look at each and every aspect of our raw materials and processes and each one of them must meet stringent green criteria.

I feel really great about this actually although this is an extra project that I have got to take on besides other stuffs I have to do. It gives me a feeling that I am contributing to something important.

Anyways, the thought of China and India and Brazil etc. coming out as upcoming economic super power is one of happiness but is also something that is of concern. Happy because we need a multipolar world. A world dominated by only one superpower is not going to be good. But above all, the thought of millions and millions of people is going to come out of “poverty” and have the opportunity to live a better life is very good.

But with all these there is a price to be paid especially the damage that is to be done to the environment (not only the damage to Man’s soul). Development eats natural resources. Lots and lots of them, from oil to aluminum, steel, coal, etc. And the burning of fuel contaminates the environment badly, especially from the burning of coal.

The thing is countries must grow but how to grow intelligently without great damage to the environment is the way forward. The old way of burning ourselves to death does not work. We need to work out new and better ways of doing things, use clean and renewable energy, etc. China contributes a lot to the world’s CO2 emission but China is also at the forefront in spending on new environmentally friendly energy. In fact China is focusing a lot on environmental issues as seen in the new laws that is being passed, as well as it is number one in the world in terms of green spending.

One of the nice thing I observed was when you buy books in Beijing, they wrap it in paper and tie it with strings. If you want a plastic bag, you have to pay more. This kind of practices is really good and I hope to see this happening in Malaysia as well. Also, architects have a great responsibility in designing houses or offices or factories that is environmentally friendly, by using natural lighting, solar and wind power, intelligent power management systems, natural air-ventilation systems, etc. We are already seeing a lot of these in new buildings in China.

After all, we have to take care of our house. But we also have to grow and make our people live a better life, lead a better quality life. But we can do it much more intelligently, with our new technologies and insights, our new understanding of science and engineering. If we continue to grow using the Industrial-Age methods, we will burn ourselves to death.

Finally managed to find some time to go and watch VENGEANCE, the new Johnnie To movie. One could not but think of Park Chan-wook’s vengeance trilogy (SYMPATHY FOR MR. VENGEANCE, OLD BOY and SYMPATHY FOR LADY VENGEANCE) and make mental notes.

However, I feel that Johnnie To’s motive is not the same as Park’s also touching on the same subject. Johnnie To is more inclined to make visually stunning movies, cool movies. Watch SPARROW. What a cool movie it is. Johnnie’s movies are more about brotherhood and honour, about being cool, about “Yi Hei”, which reminds one of John Woo’s brotherhood movies such as A BETTER TOMORROW, only that Johnnie’s films are more extravagantly cool looking (the killer’s black raincoat uniform even though it was not raining, the cigarette smoking scene in SPARROW, the umbrella scenes in both SPARROW and VENGEANCE, the bicycle shooting scene in VENGEANCE, etc. etc.)

In fact, Johnnie’s films has always been cool. The scenes always so idiosyncratic and memorable (remember the shopping complex shoot-out scene in THE MISSION?).

So what is this VENGEANCE movie about? The plot is simple. Everything is in the execution. The topic of vengeance was not touched upon the way Park Chan-wook did. The movie is just about a family got killed by some killers and the wife’s father came and wanted revenge. And he himself hired killers to hunt his enemies down. That’s all. But go watch and see for yourself how the film was shot.

By the way, Wong Kar Wai’s ASHES OF TIME REDUX is now showing in the GSC International screens.

Also, I watched UP and love it! Don’t miss UP.

Here is something that I have been thinking about. I think I haven’t really put enough seriousness in playing Go. I mean I do play very serious games which all that is in my mind is to find a way to win, and win I must but a lot of my games are not serious at all. I noticed that all the strong players treat each game seriously, and they play to win. That mindset is the mindset to getting stronger. And I believe it and must now try to think that way too.

I am actually quite sick of having to say, “oh it’s just a teaching game, so the moves are to prompt the student”, or, “oh, I was just playing there to see if the ’student’ replies correctly or not”, or “I was just testing my moves”, or “I ‘let water’ only”. I am truly getting quite sick of this and I think this is a major roadblock to anyone wanting to improve Go. I don’t think any good and strong Go player thinks like this. To improve Go, there is only one way. To play seriously together with a desire to win, or at least this is what I believe now.

Come to think of it, it really makes no sense to lose and then give excuses. Why not win first then only talk? Why must one lose to teach or experiment? Why not win first then teach the student what he played wrong or win first then only say you could have ‘let water’? I think it is all excuses and to cheat oneself, to want to believe one is actually strong but could not take the fact that one is actually not as strong as one would like to believe. And thus the masking and the excuses.

This whole idea is wrong. It feels wrong.

Anyways, from now on, I vow to treat every game seriously. Played seriously with a desire to win. So if I lose, there shall be no excuses. There is only one reason why I lose. I am weaker than my opponent. At least for the game that has just concluded. And this shall be admitted. Only then will there be a path to become stronger.

And of course, if I win, I will refuse all the excuses my opponent gives me. I will just think he or she is weaker than me. At least for the game that we just played. I will assume he or she played seriously. If not playing seriously, why waste time and play at all? Better go to a movie?

Remember: If you lose, YOU are weaker. No excuses. Just go and study and practice more instead of giving excuses why you “could” have won. Face the fact. Face reality.

“It’s not denial. I’m just selective about the reality I accept.” -Calvin and Hobbes

I remember many years ago, in one of my training, the facilitator asked what is “Ego” and my friend Ashok who is always very clever and is also a big movie buff answered that Ego is what is between the Id and the Super-Ego. He is absolutely right. What a clever answer.

Anyways, what we learned was that Ego in itself is not a bad thing, contrary to what many people believe. In fact, having an Ego is a good thing and is essential to one’s psychological health. However, it is also a double edged sword when it is left unchecked.

I learn the lesson quite young, around 16 years old. I am sure I had my lessons before that but what happened when I was 16 impacted me greatly and even until now, I can still remember the scene vividly.

It was one of our usual band practice and being one of the leaders of the band then, I am seen as a fierce a**hole. Then one fine day, after the practice, a guy whom I was quite friendly with came up to me and told me this:

“You know, HD, what is your problem? Your problem is that you always, ALWAYS, have to win an argument, no matter if it is right or wrong”.

I remember that and appreciate it until now because firstly, it takes the guy considerable guts to dare say that to my face and secondly, he cares about me enough to tell me the truth while others may be caught in the emperor’s new clothes syndrome. For that I am thankful to that guy even until now. He even came to my wedding ;-)

What he told me really made me think. Why am I so stuck up and has to be correct all the time? Isn’t it possible that I be wrong sometimes too? Should I listen to what others have to say too?

My second lesson came after I started work. It just struck me deep and I still can remember my boss’s face as he told me:

“If you don’t know, just say you don’t know”.

So I begin to think, do I really HAVE to know everything? It is just impossible, so to stick to the idea that I HAVE to know everything when I don’t, I sometimes just Bullshit. And people know it when you bullshit. Or you parrot someone else opinions or thoughts. And people will know that you are just a parrot. People just know that YOU DON’T KNOW and you PRETEND that you know.

Nothing is more damaging to one’s reputation than being found out that you are just a pretentious parrot.

So these two are really important lessons. First, you are not always right, so be humble, listen to others. Then only will you learn.

Secondly, it is impossible that you know everything. There are bound to be things that you don’t know. And when you don’t know, just be humble (really humble, not pretend to he humble), and just say you don’t know (and bloody well get to learn it and know it).

Only then can one be truly humble, because to know what you know, and to know what you don’t know, that is a great wisdom.

So stop bullshitting and start living.

p/s: Other lessons I have learned:

Most of the time:
a. You are at most only half as clever and good as you think you are.
b. When you point one finger at others, always realize that there are at least three fingers pointing at you.
c. Confidence is when you are strong and willing enough to admit defeat, to acknowledge that you are inferior but with a belief that you shall overcome them, and you overcome them and emerge better. Confidence cannot come from pretending to know all answers and pretending to be good in everything when you are not.